Things I had forgotten about winter riding

The farmer's almanac calls for a colder than normal winter this year. If the last couple of weeks have been any indication, methinks it might be correct. I missed out on the great freeze that happened while I was in Florida .... I got a call from a friend saying she brushed snow off of her car so I took this pic to sympathize from afar.

Anyhoo - this past weekend I had the pleasure of remembering cold-weather riding. The CycleLife girls met up for a team ride Saturday morning in Rock Creek Park. On my drive down to Casa de Zim, the outside temperature was 19 degrees. I mentally ran down the list of Michelin-man supplies - you know, the layers and layers that make us identifiable only by the bikes we ride and the ponytail/pig tails that trail us. Its a hot look. So, without further adieu, here's my list of things I had forgotten about winter riding:

1. My head grows in the winter. No, I don't get all pompous or anything, it grows because of the layer of insulation necessary when the temps drop below 30 degrees. You know, those skull caps that, for women, become insulating hair nets. Sweet. The problem is the headache I get about mid-ride when I remember that I forgot that my helmet doesn't fit over a winter hat.

2. Vaseline is my friend. Get your mind out of the gutter !! A little Vaseline on my face prevents me from looking like a 90-year-old woman at the end of a cold, windy ride - it prevents windburn and makes a nice little insulating layer. It also allows your tears to slip off your face virtually unnoticed - which brings me to #3.

3. You cry for no apparent reason. No, not really, they're tears from the cold and wind. Most of the time. Another great side effect is at the end of a ride your eyes look like you've been drinking for four days and are currently riding a drug-induced high.

4. Winter gloves should always have that soft material on the outside. Lets face it - we all become mucus machines when the temps drop. The plus side is that when you have some Vaseline on your face, the residual snot that you didnt wipe with your soft-sided glove mostly slides right off.

These have the best name ever - patented "Snotnose" thumbwipes. Super.

5. After about an hour or so in super cold weather, rides get really quiet. At first I thought it was because everyone was in the zone ... but no, we're all suffering from frozen lips. You know what I'm talking about - when you can't form full words because you can't move your lips. This must be divine intervention, because it's usually this point in the ride that I wonder (silently, since I can't move my lips) what the hell is wrong with us that we regard this as "fun".

6. Drinking cold water in cold weather sucks. However, since you've been eating salt (along with whatever else is leftover on the road) and the wind is kicking your arse, you must remember to drink. Teammate Mitch was amused and intrigued when she realized I had hot coffee in one of my waterbottles. Hey, I gotta do what works.

7. Speaking of coffee - it is a beautiful thing to end a ride at CycleLife with teammates, where we can enjoy some pipin' hot lattes, relax and revel in the adventure of it all. Pic courtesy of teammates Chicken and Goat ... a better post-ride recap is at Chicken's blog.

Bundle up and get out there ... you don't want people to think a bunch of girls are tougher than you, do you ?